When your mind wants to bolt

When your mind wants to bolt,

But your heart hangs on,

It’s because you don’t know

(with absolute certainty )what the truth is.

 

When you waste so much time

On something that you want to believe is true,

You begin to overthink ….

 

Eventually, something obvious becomes twisted

into something absurd,

Which keeps us from believing a simpler answer.

 

Over time, you believe your own lies and fantasies

to shield yourself from hurt,

when following what is logical would have been the quickest way to healing.

 

It’s through your own self-imposed delusions

That you lose your perspective.

 

The world then becomes different to you

When in fact you are different.

Why? Because your own ego gets in the way.

 

Everyone wants to feel special.

Everyone wants to have faith in others.

Everyone wants to believe in fairytales, happy endings

And have all bad interactions with others explained.

 

It is easier to sit in denial with your delusions

And pray God will intervene,

Not realizing he has.

 

He gave you commonsense and intuition,

But you didn’t like how it made you feel.

 

This is what true mental illness really is:

Following your gut instinct through hell

Because you want to prove you are right,

Either to yourself or others.

 

You sacrifice choosing to do right, in order to avoid pain.

 

However, you don’t realize that you have been in pain for a really long time

And believed this was how happiness felt.

 

 

(From Shannon Alder)

 

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This entry was posted in Contemporism, Faith, God, Is it me?, life, Listening and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to When your mind wants to bolt

  1. Tokoni O. Uti says:

    Our hearts and minds are WAY too complicated. Nice post!

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